Tuesday, May 20, 2014

My last phase of 20’s

I have been below the radar for 2 years and now probably is the rudest way I have ever done in order to express the wave I felt inside. I am writing this on my table, the same table for 3 years. I truly appreciated the comfort zone and the environment which currently aired for me. I have yet to achieve any ultimate remuneration here. The ongoing process which I been through here has a disequilibrium between hopes and money. The global issue which seriously need a government intervention, nah, I’m Kidding!

I’m on my last phase of 20’s. I repeat; last phase! How I missed every inches of moment of my last 10’s, 10 years back. I have the same unresolved issue. I believe the similarity will lasting for the next 10 years. I’m completely poor on the solution and surreal blur to plan and live with it. It’s like the same feeling when you had your 1st love, you failed and you fall again. I’m bored. I wish I could jump into my last chapter of my transcript. Read the plot and live my life. I should venture life like what 20th Century Fox has done to the X-Men’s sequel. A reverse story line!

Being in the last phase of my 20’s, I've photographed life like what I usually saw on others. Being a normal human being which never ever stopped me for making comparisons, which sometimes has led me to commit suicide. I am nobody and still nobody. I love the fact that when I met people which has been disappeared in my life for quite sometimes, telling me that I’m in the mid of 20’s (unnerved for 5 seconds). What’s your secret? You look like an innocent fresh graduated who actively seeking for a job (damn you). My answer is very much stereotype; ‘just enjoy your life’. Although it sounds very cliché but there’s a truth behind it. However, my emotions are fluctuated doesn’t matter how firm I claimed myself as ‘Mr Positive’.

I totally comprehend the fact that I shouldn’t be as childish as the way I am 10 years back. I make and run my decisions from the obvious. I shouldn’t see any small minor particles which eventually important for me on the other side of life. I should seeing things slightly in a different light!! Live your life to fullest (hate to use this phrase).

So here I am, at my table, my PC and loving every part of it and no matter how hard, I will make it work, because it's not only about me and my life. It's about everything else too.